Leadership: A Good Listener

Listening is a powerful tool of communication. Listening and just hearing has great difference. All of us want to have a companion who is a good listener and most of us aim to be one as well. (Added by the Moderator: And of course, 'companionship in gatherings' are different. Sometimes individuals 'collectively' can have different Motives and Agenda because of their varied backgrounds and value system. To be addressed accordingly).

What kind of Listener We Are ? A deep careful listener, a bored listener, a selective listener, a defensive listener, an interrupting listener or an insensitive listener?

Here are simple tips to be a Good Listener:

Follow the Golden Rule: “Do unto others what you want others to do unto you.”

-Put yourself in position of the one who is speaking to you.

-Make an effort to listen to the person who is speaking by giving your full attention to the speaker.

-Focus your mind to what he is trying to say, and for the unspoken messages.

-Watch for the non-verbal communications like tone of voice, hand gestures, facial expressions and other body movements.

-Listen for the real meaning and not just for the literal words.

-Finish listening first before you begin to speak for you to be sure that you understand what is being said and think clearly how to react.

-Ask questions if you are not sure, to understand what the speaker is trying to convey. Good listening requires practice and patience.

If you hone this skill, you’ll appreciate life more.

Bagchi, Sector 33.

Moderator:

a. Who Talks 'first', and who 'listens' is the crux in any social / informal / formal system. There is always a 'pattern' in any communication. We have a well-established theory called Transactional Analysis, commonly known as TA to its adherents. It is an Integrative Approach to the theory of psychology and psychotherapy, and results in Parent-Adult-Child (PAC) Model. We behave like a Parent, Adult and Child in all our conversations all the time. When to take which Role marks success of the 'transaction'. This Approach is 'integrative' because it has elements of psychoanalytic, humanist and cognitive approaches. Pse Click :http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transactional_analysis to read the 'Transactional Analysis'.

b. You find individuals 'Talking with Compassion/Authority/Forcefully with their Life Experiences in the Backdrop' (Parent), 'Reasoned Talk put Across Diligently Supported by Strong Rationale w/o Favour or Bias (Adult), and 'Indiscriminate Shouting, Sub-Normal Behaviour, Advancing Personal Agenda' (Child). It happens all the time in our Homes/Offices/Other Places where more than one person converse with each other to 'transact' any business. Aim of any 'speak' should be to 'transact' a meaningful business, of course properly 'heard' in a gathering, and 'listened-to' in a 'serene environment'. Environments are important.

A Leader is to understand it all and 'lead' accordingly. And there is also a theory & practice, 'How to Control an Unruly & Misled Crowd/Gathering?

Thanks for reminding Me to get the PAC in focus. Would help Us all,but are all of Us equally 'concerned' !

Kindly help the MC in advocating this 'Thought'. We are trying our bit in various ways.